Last spring, if I had stayed in school and been a normal kid I would’ve graduated from high school. This fall I probably would’ve started a college program, or perhaps taken a year abroad or worked for a year to save up money.

But I didn’t stay in school, and my life didn’t take that path. In February I came home to Finland after 3 months in the USA. From May to August I worked selling produce for my parents. Since then the craft business I have with my mom has been my focus. If my life was normal and I had stayed in school, none of those things would’ve happened.

But let me get to the point: People no longer assume I’m in school.

They assume I’ve graduated. Not being in school is okay.

Yes! Talk about liberating!

But it raises a point: school ends. Even if you go to school for 20 years, eventually it’s over and done with. People move on and live their adult lives. Some of us go really wild and rethink the way education works, and then when we have kids we become unschoolers and homeschoolers.

But what about me? What about other adult unschoolers? At 19 school-goers are done with basic schooling. Is telling people “I’m an unschooler” really going to get the right message across? I mean, really, a 19-year-old not going to school isn’t much of a shocker.

Other people get to say “I was homeschooled” and “I went to school.” The whole point with unschooling is that we’re life-long learners, but the thing is that unschoolers become adults and do things with their lives, too. Eventually we learn enough to step out into life on our own. Our life is no longer focused on becoming independent adults, and is instead focused on being adults.

To say it more clearly, our lives stop being about being an unschooler. We become entrepreneurs, parents, husbands, wives, doctors, authors, and whatever else our lives lead us to. We no longer answer the question “What do you do?” with “I’m an unschooler.”

And you know what? That distinction is important.

And you know what else? Forget about the word unschooling.

Please, raise your children and give them free reign in their learning. Support their curiosity, explore the world with them, deschool yourself, and make their learning environment organic and healthy. Call them unschoolers, if you like that choice of word. Be an unschooler, just like parents who homeschool their kids call themselves homeschoolers.

But are we unschoolers for life? I don’t think so. Are we life-long learners? Heck yes!

When it comes down to it, we call life-long learning “unschooling” to give it a place in the system. We only give it a word to distinguish it from school and other forms of homeschooling. It’s like how we call naturally grown food “organic.” A couple hundred years ago, “organic” food was just food.

Am I still an unschooler? No. Am I a life-long learner with a DIY and take-charge attitude? Yes. I mean, think about it. Do we call vegetarians uncarnivores? No, we don’t, because that would be silly.

So without further ado, I bid adieu to unschooling. Unschooling, you’ve been helpful and changed my life for the better, and I thank you, and I’ll spread your word, but it’s time for us to part.

Life awaits!

P.S. In case you’re wondering, Adversarian is still going to be an “unschooling” blog about living a curious DIY life, but with just a couple word changes. You’ll see words like assertive, autodidact, take-charge, and all sorts of other positive life-long learning phrases. Don’t miss out on updates! :)

Like a lot of families, I came to choose unschooling through a gradual process. In my first years at school, I enjoyed it. I loved the opportunity to learn. When the system started working against me, I started to question it. Why couldn’t I learn something the higher grades were learning? Why didn’t we read more than one chapter, if everyone was interested and concentrated on it? I didn’t know the world arbitrary then, but that’s what it felt like: a bunch of rules and regulations with no real connection to learning.

Then I discovered homeschooling. That made more sense to me. I already learned more at home than I did at school. A few years after my discovery of homeschooling, I discovered unschooling. That’s when I realized unschooling was what I had wanted all along.

So here I am.

There are a huge number of reasons to unschool. It’s likely there are as many reasons as there are unschoolers. My biggest reasons were not wanting to be stuck with my grade level subject matter. I wanted more.

Among everyone’s reasons to unschool, there are a few things we all agree on:

• Flexibility

No matter your lifestyle, budget, schedule, or interest, unschooling can work for you. The minimal necessities to a rich unschooling experience are a library card, internet access, and loving parents. Good friends, good experiences, and learning will follow.

The flexibility of unschooling can have a lot of small bonuses, too. Shopping can be done during a quiet hour. It’s easier to travel when tickets are cheap. If plans change, it’s not that big a deal. You can have a family vacation whenever it suits you. It makes a lot of things easier!

• It’s About the Learner

Schools have a lot of kids, teachers, and parents to focus their time on. Unschooling lets the experience focus on the learner and their needs. This puts the learner in a more comfortable and more secure environment. Feeling comfortable  enough to seek information, ask questions, try new things, and share experiences is very important to learning. Unschooling does just that.

Knowing that what they need is freely available (entertainment, comfort, food, sleep, etc) lets children be comfortable enough not to hoard those things. Having the freedom to choose early on helps children establish security in the world around them, and make better choices with the experience they get.

Maturity doesn’t come with age. It comes with experience.

• Real-world Experience

Speaking of experience! Instead of just focusing on theory, unschooling gives kids real, hands-on experience. There’s nothing arbitrary about any of their experiences. The things unschoolers learn are put into context (this is important – why do you think schools try to give students stories for math problems?). Their learning is a more complete experience, and is more memorable because of that.

It’s more than just academic knowledge, too. Responsibility and respect are things you learn from experience, and they can’t be forced. Unschooling helps kids learn (and experience) both, without instilling fear (like schools do with punishment, bad grades, and other assessments).

• Families Are Closer

Many parents of schooled children don’t know their children very well, and don’t spend much time with them. On top of work, school, homework, errands, and free time with friends, there’s very little time to sit down and spend time together as a family.

This heart-rending article puts it in perspective: working parents on average spend less than 30 minutes of active time with their children. Unschoolers don’t have that problem.

• It’s Fun!

Unschoolers have the biggest playground of all: the world. Unschooling encourages families to focus on making fun, entertaining lives, because that’s the best way to learn. No matter your age!

Why did your family choose unschooling? Share your story in the comments!

• Be sure not to miss the other parts of the Self-Ed 101 series:
  Self-Ed 101: A Brief History
  Self-Ed 101: Deschooling